Mondays and me are never going to see eye to eye

So today is obviously a Monday.  I’m a thirty two year old girl living with bi polar, PTSD,  and panic disorder and let me tell you everyday is literally a complete surprise.  One thing that has always stayed pretty consistent is the fact that I always feel sick mentally, physically pretty much down right can’t function on Mondays.  I know everyone always complains of having a “case of the Mondays” but in my case it’s really the fact that I back track all progression forward on Mondays and am in a constant restart in Mondays.  I came to a decision today though that I don’t know why took me so long but why oh why do I even try to set appointments,  work, really make any kind of plans when every Monday it’s always rescheduling rearranging everything setup on Monday for a different day of the week.  Today was especially special though.  It started with me feeling like I was physically going to die and ended with me feeling like there might be hope with helping a little boy talk about his problems finally instead of bottling them all inside because the truth of the matter is if people would just stop trying to be so goddamn nice and not filter everything that comes out of there month there would be a lot less shit talking, less time wasted on bullshit relationship s friendship s etc. It doesn’t make you weak or bitch to speak your mind or strange it makes you able to say it, get through it and move on.  Hopefully with a smile on your face but not always. Wouldn’t life be so much easier if we just knew where we stood with people and not always wondering about it?  Until later. …….